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Archive for the tag “leadership”

Happy Anniversary, Heidi

Today marks 15 years I have been on staff at HCC. When I graduated from Bible College I never thought I would ever get to come back home. I am so grateful to God I did. I have blogged about how I ended up back in Vermilion.

Last night at Women’s Bible Study, I was sitting in the back while we were watching a video. Between the two Bible studies, there are 60 women. Women who are hungry to know Jesus, to find peace, to have joy in the journey. Sunday night we had a worship and healing service at our church. We have them periodically. We were expecting about 80 and probably had 160 plus. I get to walk with people and watch them discover how cool God really is and how much they really matter. I was so overwhelmed at what I get to do.

 

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It is not always easy. The hours are long. The pay isn’t great. People are never done. You witness first hand the ravages of sin. In our world today we never want to talk about sin and how it destroys us mentally, physically, relationally, and most importantly, spiritually. I have sat with a family as the parents told the kid’s they were getting divorced and saw a kid changed completely in a moment. I have intervened in someone’s life who was addicted to drugs. I have helped people pick up the pieces after betrayal in marriage or a loss of a child.

But I have also seen the power of God transform lives. I have seen the drug addict get clean. I have seen marriages restored that everyone else counted as dead. I have seen kids come back from their parent’s divorce. I have witnessed teenagers finally get how good, real and loving God is. I have seen God physically heal the blind and lame. I have slept under the stars of an African sky and worshiped Jesus with my brothers and sisters in Christ. I have friends in Jamaica that have become my family.

Last fall I was asked to consider taking my own church in another community. This isn’t the first time I have been asked. This was the first time I seriously contemplated it. As my pastor and I processed through it, he told me that question I needed to settle was, “Do I see myself as a Lead Pastor?” (I am so thankful for Pastor Jim in my life. He is what a strong man in ministry should be. He is not intimidated by strong leaders; women or men. He embraces and releases them. He seeks them out. I have met people in ministry who view staff members as competitors, not comrades. We are comrades in arms. And he makes us all feel valuable and appreciated.

There are very few women Lead pastors in my denomination. That is not a criticism at all. I am proud of the fact that we have women Lead pastors. And I believe our denomination is open to them. I take very seriously what I model for younger men and women going into ministry. I want them to see a healthy, fulfilled, FRUIT-BEARING woman of God. I want them to see someone who enjoys life and ministry but isn’t afraid to share struggles. Life is hardly ever perfect and easy. I want to demonstrate how we honestly and gracefully walk through life’s trials. And I have mentored just as many young men as I have young women. I am not in competition with men. We complement each other…or we should.

I need to digress for a moment…please humor me. I have met women in ministry who try to make room for themselves simply because they are women. They fight for themselves. It appears that is all they care about. Believe me, I get it. I have met men who are against women in ministry. God asked me early on, “What do you want to be known for? You can’t fight everything so what is it you want to fight for?” I wrestled with this in my late 20’s. The answer I came to is I want to be known for fighting for souls and people. I want to be known for love. Scripture also teaches that God raises people up and casts people down. If there is something that God wants me to say He will open the doors. And He has. I have done some amazing things. Being a woman HAS NEVER KEPT GOD’S PURPOSES AND PLANS FROM BEING FULFILLED IN MY LIFE.

I am a strong woman and a strong leader. I know what it is to come under fire for decisions. I served on City Council for 8 years during some very bitter struggles. Standing for truth cost me. Reputation and money. But I did not waver. But that does not mean I have to be a Lead Pastor.

In ministry circles sometimes it is communicated, albeit unintentionally, that the Senior/Lead Pastor is the pinnacle of having arrived in ministry. That is simply not true. And it grieves me that people think that. I am reminded of the Peter Principle which is the belief that workers rise to the level of their incompetency. The main premise is that once people are in the spot in which they are most productive and fruitful (and happiest), they get promoted for doing such a good job and end up in a job they hate and are not equipped for. I don’t know how much I buy into this but there is a kernel of truth.

In my position, I get to do whatever I want to do (because I do everything I am asked). I am doing, for the most part, everything God has placed in my heart to do. I still have some big dreams (the biggest yet), but I am slowly but surely working on those dreams I believe are God-given.

Success and respect in life are not a title. Or a position. It’s not getting the big office down the hall (though it is the warmest 😉 ). Respect may come initially from these things but title and positions don’t maintain respect. It is what we do with it and how we treat people.

The Bible defines success in ministry as fruitfulness. Jesus says when we produce much fruit we bring glory to the Father. Fruitfulness is better than fame or a title. When I look over the past 15 years, I see fruit. And I believe in my soul, I have just entered the bearing much fruit phase. God is doing amazing things here in Vermilion and in my life. I work with the best team. We do not compete with each other, we complement each other. We bring out the best (on most days) in each other. When someone else looks good, we all look good.

I hosted our staff Christmas party this year. As I was on my hands and knees scrubbing baseboards (yeah…I’m that girl), I was praying about the decision. These are the thoughts I was thinking, “I could be a lead pastor, I could sit at the big people’s tables, I could have more influence, I, I, I, I.” (How do you like me now?). And I heard God speak, “Heidi, you’re not done in Vermilion. It’s not about title or position, it’s about fruitfulness.”

I love my community. And the staff I work with share the same love. This unity. This love we have for each other and our community is rare. Why would I leave this? To be known more? By who? Obviously, my answer was “no”.  And once I made up my mind, Jamaica happened. And God used it to reinforce the dreams I have and am currently working on.

I will be celebrating 20 years in ministry in May…I am sure there will be blog then as well (I am way too introspective) and looking back over all these years, I pinch myself that I get to do this.

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Our incredible staff, led by Pastor Jim and Joyce. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Mid-Life Crisis: Good or Bad?

I have been thinking a lot about mid-life crises. By definition, a mid-life crisis is an emotional crisis of identity and self-confidence that can occur in early middle age. I witnessed a good friend of mine go through one years ago leaving a wake of destruction in its aftermath. I have seen others go through them successfully. I don’t think mid-life crisis are bad things unless handled badly. I think there is something healthy about reassessing your life periodically. I tend to be extremely introspective. One of my life mottos is “If you’re not growing, you’re dying”. It hangs in my office so it must be true. 😉 Scripture talks about examining ourselves in several places. An examined life is a healthy life.

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I think I have been pondering it because over the past two months I have had four different people say something to me that struck a chord. Two of the four were in the form of a question and the other two were observations about my life. Three out of the four were basically asking the same thing, “What are you doing with your life?” They obviously took root and have been germinating in my spirit. I honestly believe God is trying to get me to see something so I can grow. My daily prayer is to be more like Jesus in all areas of my life and to daily walk out the good works He has for me (Ephesians 2:10). These are prayers He delights in answering.

Before I get to the four things people have said to me, let me give a little back-story. In July I began to work on my Masters in Strategic Leadership. I have wanted to continue my education for years. The idea of going into debt did not appeal to me at all. I had a friend tell me that I needed to not look at it as going into debt but as an investment in my future. That resonated with me so I went for it. And I am so glad that I did. Our first class and residency were on the personal life of a leader. The premise is if you are going to be a great leader, you need to be able to lead yourself well. How can you lead others if you cannot lead yourself? We learned a lot of great theory and practical tools in that class. We talked a lot about finishing well: life and ministry. We had to identify what would keep us from finishing well. My two areas were physical and financial health. Our final paper was thirteen pages. The last two pages had to be a personal growth plan for the next two years (the duration of the MASL program). It was a painful process. But healthy and life-giving.

I have two goals to be physically and financially fit by 50. There are concrete goals that I am working on. I will probably blog more on these two areas in the future. Needless to say, after scheduling an appointment with my doctor and some very frank and honest conversation, he set me on the right path of cutting out sugar and grains. I have lost 30 pounds in twelve weeks and feel the best I have in my life. I have a way to go but the accountability and desire are there. I do not want my body to give out on me before my mind and my dreams. Finishing well means taking care of the one body God has given me to do all He has called me to do.

I read a quote somewhere that said, “Men with dead eyes, dead hearts, just waiting for the rest of their bodies to catch up and die as well.” I don’t want to be like that. I think when we hit mid-life, we can choose to tread water (security) until retirement, thinking then we will do what we want or we choose to continue to take risks and grow in the present. We cannot wait for someday to do what God has put in our hearts to do.

In September, Bruce Springsteen’s autobiography came out. Anyone who knows me knows that I am a huge, huge fan. There was a companion album that came out with it. The album had a tag line describing it as, “a hard-working Jersey boy living out his wildest dreams”. I wrote in my journal, “Am I living out my wildest dreams? What are my wildest dreams?” God has given me so many.

At the church I serve at, we are going through some restructuring. It is healthy and exciting and nerve-wracking all at the same time. I love it! In September, I met with our youth pastor to discuss a change in roles and responsibilities. He would be taking some of mine and we were discussing what that would look like and where I would fit into all of that. He asked me the first question that has been causing me to think about the next season of my life. It came the day after I had read the tagline from Bruce’s album. He asked, “What do I want to be when I grow up?” He’s 26. I’m 46. And he so hit the nail on the head. (Side note: our future is in good hands. God is raising up a generation that can fix the things we have messed up. Do not fret! Our best days are ahead!) I have done about everything in church life from children to youth to missions to women to senior pastoring to pastoral care and I love it all. I am living out my wildest dreams. But I sense God is refining my wildest dreams (I am sounding like a Taylor Swift song). I have said from the time I graduated from college that I want to do it all before I die. I wanted to experience every aspect of ministry and life. But I feel God is doing a refining.

In pursuit of living a healthier lifestyle, my doctor encouraged me to listen to some podcasts. There’s a guy I have been listening to plus reading his stuff. The information is so good and makes so much sense. It’s all about the why you should not eat sugar and grains. It has changed my life. I am convinced God has used this to save my life. I believe we will look back on white sugar and it will be this generation’s version of nicotine. My mom and dad’s generation started smoking in the day in which nicotine was “good” for you. It wasn’t until the 70s the government admitted how terrible nicotine was for you. White sugar is killing us. Our health care system will break under the weight of our obesity not the Affordable Health Care Act (though that needs help, too).

I have struggled with my weight my entire life. I remember being in seventh grade and starving myself. I would eat an apple a day because you know what they say, “An apple a day keeps the doctor away”. I have lost the same sixty pounds five times during my life. I have done Weight Watchers, the cabbage soup diet, Atkins, South Beach, counted calories, and on and on. I was honestly quite concerned that I had permanently messed up my metabolism with all the yo-yo dieting. I was on the phone with one of my sisters talking about this new way of eating and working on my Masters. And she said the next thing that made me think. She said, “Heidi, any goal you have ever set, you always achieve it. You do whatever you set your mind to do. You are great at setting goals and meeting them. You are driven. Your problem is once you achieve it, you are lost, and you don’t know what to do with yourself.” That hit me like a ton of bricks. I am so thankful I have people in my life who are honest with me. God uses them to push me and examine my life.

As a result of my conversation with my sister, I began to think through my new lifestyle of eating. I was not viewing it as a diet but I knew eventually I would. What could I do now to prevent slipping back into my old behavior? The guy I have been listening to on the podcast offers paid consults. I have never done anything like that in my life. And remember my goal of being financially fit by 50? This did not fit into the budget. But I knew I needed to do something different if this was going to be lasting so I scheduled it. And I am so glad I did. He was so incredibly helpful. He was firm but genuinely caring. It was like having a personal trainer to get you started. The only way I can describe him is he is the Howard Stern of fitness. Growing up Strickler prepared me for that 😉 He asked me a question on the consult when I told him I was working on my Masters (he wanted a snapshot of my life…age, height, weight, what your schedule was like, etc). He seemed shocked that I was going back to school at 46. I thought it was normal. He asked, “What made you go back for your Masters at the age of 46?” The emphasis was on the age. I never once thought about my age when deciding whether or not I was going to go back for my Masters. It was always money and time. I never want to get intellectually lazy. And I don’t want to coast on what I have learned previously. We are to love the Lord our God with all of our hearts, all of our strength, all of our souls, and all of our minds. And I think it is part of whatever God has for me in the future.

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The last incident that happened was a dear friend called me a couple of weeks ago to inform me he had re-married. I jokingly said, “Maybe it’s time for me to think about getting married.” I remember a couple of years ago I woke up one day and thought, “How did I end up at the age 44 not married?” I knew I never wanted children but marriage had always been an option. I just never thought about it much until two years ago. Life has been so fun and so full and time just marched on and before you knew it, here I am. His reply to me was, “You have such a unique life, and it would be hard for someone to come alongside it.” In my journal that night, I wrote, “It (his statement) caused me to think what am I doing with my life?” At first, it stung. That statement made me feel like a freak. For a nano second. In the end, it caused me to appreciate the uniqueness of my life. I have never been lonely. I have amazing friends and family. The community I get to live in and serve is full of great people. I am not rich in material things but I am with the things that matter (now I feel like I’m going all George Bailey on you).

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As I contemplate those four incidents, I am so filled with excitement. God says in His Word, “For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.”

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Re-assessing your life mid-way through can be a good thing. It becomes a crisis when you fill it with things that will rob your soul and hurt those around you. The self-examined life is the healthy life.

 

 

 

 

 

Readers are Leaders…Or are they?

I am rethinking one of my favorite sayings. “Leaders are readers.” Not all readers are leaders but I have never met a good leader who doesn’t read a lot. I have heard this a lot in the circles of church leadership development that I run in. And it is true, leaders are readers but I don’t believe it is in the way we think. When I hear this or say it myself, it gives people a sense that they must only read leadership or spiritual development books. And there are SO MANY books out there on leadership development. And I am reading a lot of them since I started working on my Masters of Strategic Leadership in July. I think what is meant when we say leaders are readers is that a characteristic of a good leader is someone who reads a lot of different types of books. It’s kind of like the age old question…what came first? The chicken or the egg? Does reading a lot make good leaders or do good leaders read? I think of reading as a characteristic of a good leader, not necessarily a prerequisite. Reading develops critical thinking and gives us different perspectives and expands our mind.

I love reading and writing.  I don’t just want to read about life, I actually want to live it and I don’t want to just write about life, I want to experience it. There is a balance in all things. I am trying to maintain a balance between reading, writing, and living (with school, reading is winning right now ;).

I have composed a list of my favorite books. I thought I would share and would love to hear some of your favorite books.

  1. The Bible – no book has changed my life like this has. It has shown me who God is, what He has done for me and how He wants me to live my life. I am in this book daily.
  2. Elie Wiesel’s Night. All of the books I had read on the holocaust before this book mentioned the atrocities of the concentration camps and loss of loved ones but always highlighted the hope and the good that came out of it. This book made me see the reality of the evil and terrible things that happened inside the concentration camps. I believe every high school student should read this. Mankind is capable of great evil. 9780553272536-us-300
  3. The Nancy Drew books -I know this sounds silly. Of all the books to be able to make it to the top 10, these make it? (I still have all the hardcover books.) I read them all multiple times as a kid/pre-teen. The hero of the story was a GIRL who could think  and solve problems on her own. She was also brave and independent. I was going through an exercise a few months back in a book I was reading and realized the significant impact these books had on me. I could be the heroine of my own life.
  4. Mere Christianity by C.S. Lewis. He is my favorite author. This is the first book I read after I became a Christian besides the Bible. He impacted me profoundly. I discovered Christians do not have to check their brain at the door. Christianity really is a thinking person’s religion. Faith and the brain are compatible. We are to love the Lord our God with all of our heart, all of our soul, all of our MIND, and all of our strength. Lewis also introduced me to apologetics. 927275-_uy200_
  5. The Chronicles of Narnia by C.S. Lewis. I try to read this series every couple of years. He was brilliant with apologetics, science fiction, and fiction. The allegories and spiritual truths portrayed in these books are phenomenal. I never get tired of reading these books. My favorite quotes come from them.
    1. “Aslan,” said Lucy. “You’re bigger.” “that is because you are older, little one,” answered he. “Not because you are?” “I am not. But every year you grow, you will find me bigger.” Prince Caspian
    2. All their life in this world and all their adventures had only been the cover and title page: now at last they were beginning chapter one of the Great Story which no one on earth has read: which goes on forever in which every chapter is better than the one before.  The Last Battle
    3. “I have come home at last! This is my real country! I belong here. This is the land I have been looking for all my life, though I never knew it till now…” “come further up, come further in.”
    4. “Safe?” said Mr. Beaver; “don’t you hear what Mrs. Beaver tells you? Who said anything about safe? Course he isn’t safe. But he’s good. He’s the king, I tell you!” The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe. img_0646bookbox2.jpg
  6.  How People Grow by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend. This book has had more impact on me in my ministry and view of how people grow spiritually than any other book I have read. The one issue as a pastor I have always struggled with is why do some people really get what it means to follow Jesus and live a full, productive, joyful life while others remain stuck. This was life to me.yhst-20550167876698_2167_8150648
  7. Risk is Right by John Piper. His teaching on the supremacy of God and finding satisfaction in God that leads to joy have deeply impacted me. In this short pamphlet, Mr. Piper teaches on taking risks and Romans 8. So good. I have probably bought and given away 20+ copies of this book.4369a1167ecd879969b6075e83738285
  8. Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen. I am a romantic at heart. This may surprise many but it is true. A couple of summers ago, I read through every book Jane Austen wrote. I loved every single one of them though this will always be my favorite. prideprejudice423x630
  9. Love Does by Bob Goff. I read this book about two years ago. It is a story of an ordinary man and how he chooses to live his life actually loving people instead of just talking about it. He lives such a BIG life. This book set into motion a lot of things for me. I took some risks and made some changes. I also became a stalker of his and got him to speak on a conference call to a WIML group I was helping lead at the time. I have bought this book over 10 times to give away. 41sigmrxqal-_sy344_bo1204203200_
  10. Winds of War/War and Remembrance by Hermann Wouk. He also wrote The Caine Mutiny but these are the two books of his that I absolutely loved. He wrote them in the 70s. I read them both in the mid-80s as a teenager. The first book is about the lead up to World War 2 (I love history). The sequel is about the war, the holocaust (which is why he said he wrote the book),  and the birth of Israel as a nation. These books have stuck with me since then. f0bbdcc0bdd0cb5c04d9c5302f6c08ce
  11. Honorable Mention: These next two books I have read in the past year and have made me think. Time will tell if they remain in my top 12. I think they will. The Rainbow Comes and Goes by Anderson Cooper and Gloria Vanderbilt. This book is mom and son e-mailing back and forth getting to know one another later in life. It made me wish I could have known my mom better. And there is a quote that has resonated with me. It is Gloria who writes it. She says                                                                                         “I find it reassuring knowing the rainbow comes and goes. It helps me accept the way things often are. In every life, you have moments of blinding beauty and happiness, and then you land in a dark cave and there is no  color, no sky. Then the rainbow returns, sometimes only briefly, but it always does come back. You have to believe that it will, even in the darkest of times. That belief is what is really important. Nothing is meant to last forever. Our lives are fleeting. We surround ourselves with objects, collect things, try to hold on to people and money and status, but it doesn’t last. We are not meant always to be happy, and who would want to be? Happiness would become meaningless if it were a constant state. If you accept that, then you will not be surprised when something bad occurs, you will not gnash your teeth and ask, “Why me? Why has this happened to me?” It has happened to you because that is the nature of things. No one escapes. The rainbow comes and goes. Enjoy it while it lasts. Don’t be surprised by its departure, and rejoice when it returns. There is much to be joyful about, so many different kinds of rainbows in one’s life: making love is an incredible rainbow, as is falling in love; knowing friendship; being able to really talk with someone who has a problem and say something that will help; waking up in the morning, looking out, and seeing a tree that has suddenly blossomed, like the one I have outside my window-what joy that brings. It may seem a small thing, but rainbows come in all sizes….the searching, that’s what I think life is really all about. Don’t you? 27859751
  12. The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho. This book is so good. It is about a shepherd boy going on an adventure to find his personal legend (follow his dream). Such a powerful allegory with an incredible twist in the end. A personal legend is,               “It’s what you have always wanted to accomplish. Everyone, when they are young, knows what their Personal Legend is. At that point in their lives, everything is clear and everything is possible. They are not afraid to dream and to yearn for everything they would like to see happen to them in their lives. But, as time passes, a mysterious force begins to convince them that it will be impossible for them to realize their Personal Legend…There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure.” 9780062315007_p0_v2_s192x300

So what are some of your favorite books?

 

Characteristics of a Leader.

I was cleaning through desk drawers at work the other day and came across a loose piece of paper entitled “Important Characteristics of a Leader.” It was written in my handwriting. I have no idea if I came up with this list or not. I think I did. I have this bad habit of whenever a thought comes to me, I grab for whatever is available. I have deep thoughts (and not so deep thoughts) written on grocery receipts, index cards, scratch paper. I actually came across a recipe for baked beans written on a napkin. I blame my 7th and 8th grade Language Arts teachers (any VMS Skippers out there?). When we were learning to do research papers, we had to put individual thoughts and facts on index cards so we could put move them around our main points. It was very effective. In fact, I had the best teachers. I felt completely prepared for college. But this method obviously has had its down side. 😉

The baked bean recipe. I don't think it is my handwriting.

The baked bean recipe. I don’t think it is my handwriting.

So here it is…

8 Important Characteristics of a Leader

  1. Leaders are real/authentic.
    1. Don’t try to be someone else or something you are not.
  2. Leaders are not afraid to admit they are wrong.
  3. Leaders are readers.
  4. Leaders are not afraid to ask for help or prayer.
  5. Leaders will not ask someone to do something they would not do themselves.
  6. Leaders take risks!
  7. Being right is not the always the most important thing.
  8. CHARACTER, CHARACTER, CHARACTER is always more important than giftings and charisma.

 

Picture doesn't show it but this page is yellowing. Who knows when I wrote it. But I still say the same things. :)

Picture doesn’t show it but this page is yellowing.Who knows how old it is. I still say the same things 🙂

Dessert First!

I lead our women’s Bible study at church. This session, we are doing Ann Voskamp’s One Thousand Gifts. In her book, she encourages women to keep a gratitude journal of 1,000 gifts..a 1,000 gifts from God. This exercise is to take place over a year and the gifts are not to be what He has already given you but the daily gifts He so graciously bestows. A thankful heart is a full heart. A thankful life is a full life!

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I went out and bought a journal to keep track of my 1,ooo gifts. Not just any journal but an orange one. Bright and plain. Kind of like me! 🙂 It has been so good for me and my walk with Jesus.

My plain orange journal and my Bible!

My plain orange journal and my Bible!

Here are some of my gifts that I have listed in my bright orange journal:

3. The sound of wind chimes outside my window while I sleep.

8.The Christmas lights at McGarvey’s Landing as they dance on the Vermilion River.

14. Cake that tastes like summer (coconut).

19. Game night with my nieces and nephew. 

26. Finding chocolate in the church cabinet (twix, snickers 🙂 )

37. Praying with people at the altar.

Today I listed #45 of 1,000 gifts.

February 1 will mark 11 years that I have been on staff at my church. That is a long time to be at one place in ministry especially as an associate pastor. I am very blessed to be ministering with the pastoral staff that God has assembled here. Pastor Jim who is my boss/pastor/friend is a good man and a great leader.  He is worth having his own blog but I will wait until it gets close to raise time before I write it 😉     (I’m kidding)

This afternoon, we both attended a ministerial meeting that included a luncheon. As we were getting up to go in the buffet line, Pastor Jim went straight for the desserts. Totally skipped the sandwiches and the chili and the chips. He was a man who knew what he wanted….and he got it. A beautiful looking piece of cherry pie. A feeling of gratitude overwhelmed me. I know that sounds weird but it did. It really speaks of why I have been able to work with him for 11 years. He is a leader who is not afraid to break the rules and take risks for Jesus. He doesn’t always do what’s expected of him (he usually does more).  He enjoys life and people.  So here was my #45 in my gratitude journal:

My entry today.

My entry today.

I am so very glad to be serving alongside a leader who goes for the dessert first.

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